Bittersweet

Really, its just been raining on my face.

DVD Vendetta!

My DVD machine has decided to go on an all "technical error" holiday leave in this current moment and did not previously notify me. Am I angry? YES. Did I try "shaking" this machine? YES? Have I unplugged and plugged it back in again? 5 TIMES! 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't understand the whole "NO SIGNAL" alert you are giving me! THE CABLE IS CONNECTED! A FUSION OF ELECTRICITY-PHOTON SHIT IS SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?! I can't properly "work" on this blog if I'm not able to watch anything... CAN I? So there might be an indefinite break on the TV "research" thing... but knowing me, I'll find a way to make it work (aka swap it for my mother's DVD machine). 

On another note, I'll entertain you with my stories from my personal life: I've been getting nosebleeds just about everyday since I got back. 

I'm in the shower, just washing my face but NOOOOO that's not gonna happen! Instead I have to blindingly stumble out of my shower, with my head back, towards the direction of tissue. As much as that might have sound easy, I'm hoping it doesn't become part of my shower ritual. 

Imagine it with a nosebleed and it will be exactly the same as my reaction

I wake up in the morning and NOSEBLEED! Like MAGIC! Even my blood is trying to escape my body. It's all like, I don't like you anymore, you suck! No Blood, I do not suck, I am dehydrated and jet lagged. So please be kind to me as I am trying to infuse as much liquids into my system just so you don't have to stain my towels. 

I wish I was drunk when writing this, it would've made more sense. 

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Is it sad that I'm waiting for New Year's so I can watch Doctor Who: The End of Time (part 2)?

On another note, I am sad that David Tennant is leaving his role on Doctor Who. VERY SAD about this. The news hasn't hit me this hard until I just watched The Christmas Special (part 1) today.

I know its creepy to have a picture of a random baby, but its the only way to show you how really depressed I am about this non-issue.

Not many of you know that I am quite a huge fan of Doctor Who+David Tennant series. In fact, I fucking LOVE IT. About 80% of the reason I watch the show is because of David Tennant.

You say, "Really? ... David Tennant?"

Please don't be a hater now, I'm still quite sensitive towards the news.

Now, let's all swoon at his picture.

le sigh... CALL ME!

Here's a really short recap (aka SPOILER ALERT):

• The Master is back and is still batshit crazy
• And the Time Lords return... Yes... PLURAL! Like a whole spaceship full of them! WTF? I THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONLY ONE LEFT?!
• Timothy Dalton plays the leader (If I'm not mistaken) and he spits a lot.
• You can read a more in-depth recap HERE!

Because you all have been good in reading my open love letter to David Tennant, I shall reward you now with the first 1:52 seconds of Part 2:


*Thanks Sabrine for introducing this show to me

Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays!

It never hurts to have a little bit of Wham! during Christmas.

Casu Marzu

This is the most disgusting shit I've ever seen in my life. This will be my Christmas gift to all of you: the knowledge of Casu Marzu...

Casu Marzu is basically a Sardinian cheese delicacy. Why is it a delicacy?

BECAUSE ITS CHEESE COVERED IN MAGGOTS! Casu Marzu literary translates to "rotten cheese" and has been dubbed "the world's most dangerous cheese." I'm usually okay with eating delicacies of other countries, but this shit has just crossed its line in food decency.

So basically they make pecorino cheese from sheep's milk, and they would open the cheese to invite flies to lay their eggs there. Before you know it, there's maggots crawling everywhere and eating the cheese. Yes, you eat it with the LIVE MAGGOTS (supposedly the best part)! Apparently there's a distinctive strong sour taste that could last up to hours in your mouth. So pleasant...

Ok, getting back to the "most dangerous" part, apparently, the maggots goes through your digestive system UNDIGESTED and could cause some serious problems if it didn't go out of your body. Also, these little worms could also jump 6 inches up in the air, and maybe into your eye. Really Sardinia, really?!

Before you watch this video, I do have to warn you that it is slightly disgusting. I can't embed it, so here's the link for the English version: Gordon Ramsay F-Word: Casu Marzu
And for you lazy-ass people that can't even click on a link, here's a German one:

SPARTAAAAAcus!

I am now currently back in Singapore and suffering from a horrible disease called "Jetlag." With hours to pass by in the early morning, I found this trailer for an upcoming Starz show called Spartacus: Blood and Sand.

If any of you like either 300 or Gladiator, I highly recommend you to watch it because it looks like a fusion of both movies with a flair of porn.


According to sources (via Perez), this show hasn't even been aired yet and the networks are so happy about it, they already renewed it for the second season. Let's just hope for Starz network that at least 2 million people will watch it on the night of the premiere.

P.S.: According to a tipster, this trailer is using the same music as in 300...... You know who their target audiences are: MEN. I hope to the Universe, that they don't have those stupid catchphrases like "THIS IS SPARTAAAA!!!!" Because, come January, if I hear drunken college boys yelling SPARTAAAAAAAA!!!!! SPARTAAA! SPAAAARTA! I will personally throw my cactus at them. It happened once already, I don't need to go through it again.

Squeaky

I always wonder why there's always barely any Durex condoms in the states. I know this commercial is old, but its the holidays and tis the time for love-sharing/making. Especially in December, gift wrap your member.

And I think its one of the best condom commercials out there. This video is NSFW.

If you've ever thought of boiling an entire chicken...

If you are thrilled and titillated by the sight of this person's deep skin crevices and expletive filled chef-targeted rants.....but his coooking instructions remind you of a grocery list on crack... (watch below, fast forward to 25 second mark if you are impatient)



.......there may be a niche for you in the cooking world after all.



"Worst Cooks in America," featuring a guy who actually boiled a chicken, melted what I hope to God is cheese on it- and seems to be quite proud of it.

When I saw the colorful cast of characters in this kaleidoscope of cooking horrors, I have to be honest, I didn't think of kitchens, food, my own cooking mishaps... the thougth that ran through my mind in Kanye West style caps-lock font was...
"wait...that girl looks familiar...OH MY GOD THAT GIRL WORKS IN MY OFFICE! THAT GIRL WORKS IN MY OFFICE! THAT GIRL WORKS IN MY OFFICE" (ok i think three times got the point across)

...yes, indeed, one of the illustrious contestants on this show, (not the one who boiled a chicken, that wouldn't say much for my work colleagues, now would it?) is someone i see on a daily basis in my office.

I am now flooded with plans to stalk the breakroom/toaster/microwave area. Should I challenge her to an impromptu cook-off using only the ingredients in the breakroom? (old pizza, coffee grinds, and teabags...oooh, how Heston Blumenthal of me.) Should I observe every cup of coffee she makes to see if there's a signature "I won Worst Cooks in America" turn of the hand or flip of the wrist? Maybe I'll ask her to season and microwave some soup for me...

My working life is now just a little bit more interesting.
(on another note, apologies to the judgmental one for my lack of blog contributions. i know, shameful.)

Science Time!

I actually own this sweater

I have been wearing my super nerdy thick glasses and my cute ugly Christmas sweater all day and it has actually affected me to the darker side of knowledge... TO SCIENCE!

So if any of you are hosting/attending a holiday party, you can do these 10 tricks to "impress" your coworkers/friends/family. No, really, don't do this unless you want to be a virgin for the rest of your life. Well... its not THAT bad... I personally think some of them are cool... but like I said, do it with some precaution knowing that you might be SHAMED for the rest of the night.
What I think is cool, isn't necessarily cool to other human beings.

via Boing Boing

The Weather Outside is Frightful

But the fire is so delightful (from my cardboard fireplace).

And since I have no where to go

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. 

HIBERNATION MODE HAS BEGUN AGAIN! I am in a search for a good show that will keep me entertained for the next two days. Please suggest something as I'm not sure what it is I'm suppose to be watching now. I'm hitting what you would call a "TV block." I need some serious help. 

As much as I am disliking this weather outside, there's just something so relaxing about watching falling snow. If I go desperate, I'm going to start reviewing the snow fall. 
EXAMPLE: Its so delicate in the ways it falls, but yet sometimes the wind comes so strongly and disturbs the peace of it... Just by looking outside, I feel like I can catch an automatic cold already. Yeah, not so much of a talent on being a weather forecaster. 

The Sing-Off

Glee fever is sweeping over the nation and NBC decided to take a slice of the cake, by putting on a reality show competition on accapella groups... The show is called The Sing-Off... (insert your own joke here)

While watching the pilot, the only reaction I have is: Uh, what the hell is this? No offense to the singers, they have wonderful voices but... its BEYOND lame. You know when you watch something and you get a knot in your stomach and you feel your skin crawling under you? Well, that sums up the entire show. Just make it stop.

I know some people will miss Glee in their 4 months hiatus, but watching this is like dating your worst rebound ever. EVER!

And this was the tipping point to the bad side

Nick Lachey as the host ... NO NBC, NO!

Holidays Special Layout

Hope you bitches LOVE my new *special* layout just for the holidays! Tis' the time to celebrate with an extra cheer of booze (aka add some bailey's to your morning coffee). Ok, now go back to work!

But for those who don't have work to do (or is just in a state of beyond procrastination) here is some MARIAH CHEER FOR YOU!

Quote of Yesterday

"I did not run for office to be helping out a bunch of, you know, fat-cat bankers on Wall Street." -President Barack Obama

I don't know why his ratings are so low, with metaphors like that, he should at least have an approval rate of AWESOMENESS! FAT CAT OWNERS OF THE WORLD, YOU CAN REJOICE WITH THIS WONDERFUL SHOUT-OUT! Raise your cat in the air (Lion King style) and give out a holla to it because its kind has been recognized by the world now! I don't even know how calling people as fat cats are an insult, but you know I'm going to start calling everyone that now.

Reasons why I shouldn't be in politics: (read sentences above).

Dexter Marathon and Shock

I have been on a Dexter marathon for the last couple of days. It took me so long to watch this show because I can only watch it when there's sunlight, which is getting less and less as the days passed by. This show is beyond heavy, like the type that makes you want to drink and smoke after watching 2 episodes of it. But yet, its brilliant at the same time (I really mean it, kudos to you writers).

I just saw the season finale and now I am OFFICIALLY DEPRESSED. I won't tell you what happened in the last 5 minutes of the show, but you scroll below if you want to know what happens. DO NOT CONTINUE READING IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW! It will become a major spoiler of your fucking day.

Quote of the Day

"Scott, you don't understand. This group was my Dreamgirls... I was Effie." - Cameron Tucker from Modern Family

Two of my favorite things combined. Swirly goodness.

Lapses of Judgments

In the subzero temperature of last night, me and a friend decided to start drinking on Washington Square Park (cause we're klassy like that). As we were chugging our giant bottle of Corona-covered-in-plastic bag (cause we care about the law), three individuals came in a duration of a minute and offered us "Ganjaganjahashweedhash." Seriously, that's how they said it.

Image from The Wire (aka Barack Obama's favorite show)

During my time in NYU, I have never been offered drugs at the park, I thought it was so 90's of them to do so. I guess business was slow because it was so fucking cold last night and only people like us were out there (aka wannabe hobos). We chugged that beer in 5 minutes as we realize that we couldn't feel our fingers anymore.

So we continued our debauchery by going into a liquor store to buy more ammo. As I was at the cashier, he asked for my ID. I gave it to him. He looked at it, then looked at me... Then he asked me what's my address in my ID.

My response: I have NOOO IDEA. (wrong answer)

He gave a priceless reaction, then said, "You don't know where you live?"

Me: Dude, I don't live in California, I really don't know the address there. I know there's Corporate Park, Irvine. Something something, something.

Him: Alright then, when's your birthday?

Me: March 30, 1987

Him: I'm sorry but I have to swipe your card (I started laughing because I KNOW I can't be wrong about that)

Me: Go ahead, its real

(swipes)

Him: Alright miss, that will be $17.62

Me: Thanks

I guess I'm flattered that I still get carded... or I must look really different from my ID picture. Anyways, we decided to head into a bar before drinking some more later on. There's a bar below my friend's apartment called "Heather's". I don't know what the hell is wrong with that bar, but it smells like piss. Seriously, it smells like the toilet was their floor.

Later, I read on Yelp that the place was hipster central, I'm like... WHY? Is it because its "ironic" to go to a bar that smells like a man with a B.O. problem and a dirty urinal COMBINED? For 10 seconds I stood there wondering if I should just get used to the smell and start drinking. Yeah, I don't think so. If you guys think I'm "over-exaggerating," please feel free to venture there and give me some feedback.

I Love New York.

Up Yours Domino's

So, a LOT of Italian Americans are SUPER PISSED that their community is being portrayed by the guidos and guidettes of Jersey Shore. They're so angry that Domino's didn't want to be associated with the show anymore, pulling all the plugs in future advertising.

MTV didn't care. Because this week, the episode was sponsored by Bod Man Body Spray.

Have you ever seen the commercials?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lK7tnlt6UA

ITS DIRECTLY AIMED FOR THE DAMN GUIDOS THEMSELVES! HOW FUCKING BRILLIANT OF YOU MTV! Look at this: A shirtless men with rock hard abs is sandwiched between 2 women in heat. This has guido written all over it, Bod isn't even trying to be subtle. They need to make sure that every wannabe/guido will immediately run out of to the nearest pharmacy and stock that shit like its a new replacement for hair gel.

I also realized that the commercials looks like part of the show, as to confuse watchers (aka me) making them not DVR-ing through the commercial sets.

Don't Do This At Home

Its trying to eat you.

Jersey Shore is Sent From Heaven

How did I miss the premiere of "Jersey Shore" last Thursday? HOW?? This show is basically the best reality whatever there is on television right now! This show defies GRAVITY! That's how it blows the expectation out of my mind. Have you seen this show? ANYONE?? ITS AMAHZING.

Here's an in-depth analysis via Defamer as my mind is still in a high and I don't want writing to kill my buzz:

Jersey Shore is like opening a tiny present to find it is full of diamonds, but diamonds made of booze, puke, fights, diseases, and discarded thongs. You thought this gift couldn't get better, but it does. It really, really does.

The amazing thing about Jersey Shore is that it is comprised of only one very distinctive type—the guido—and it is a type in which all of the participants not only willingly identify, but glorify. They are not afraid of being seen as a stereotype because they want to be the big-haired, muscled out, tanned freak in a too-tight Armani Exchange top. While the rest of society may deride the guido, these specimens see nothing wrong with it, because they live in a universe where it is the norm. Based on the other inmates in the Sleazeside Heights zoo, there is nothing manufactured about these people. They do not possess the fame-seeking guile of the Speidis of the world, because their only aspiration is to be revered as the ultimate guido. Because of this, no coaxing into conformity with reality show norms is needed. All the cameras have to do is sit back and observe.

Who's my favorite character? ALL OF THEM! Each of them are a rough diamond covered in fake tan. Please let there be like 5 seasons of this TV God, if you let us endure with The Hills for so long, this is one of the ways you can reward us for the torture you have put through us. Amen.

Where Have You Been, Son?

You probably noticed that I'm not a sports-watching person at all, but I received a clip that made me interested in football a bit more.

To be precise, I'm in awe of Zebrie Sanders, the offensive lineman for Florida State (I don't understand either). As you can see, Mr. Sanders here is ready to "quit this bitch" of a game and decided to just stand motionless, all in while chaos seems to be enclaved upon him.

I bet you this is what is going through his mind: "Man, I'm so tired. Maybe if I don't move at all, nobody will notice me."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cV448r5f2qI

Camouflage FAIL! But you know what? With that kind of name, he automatically becomes my personal HERO! Zebrie will definitely be up there on my pet/plant/kid/sophisticated debris name list. That's what I'm going to call my dust bunnies now.

*Thanks Anonymous

Brad and Quentin in a Japanese Eating Show

"Huh?"

That's what I thought.

Apparently, Brad Pitt and Quentin Tarantino were in Japan to promote their movie, Inglorious Basterds.

By promote, I mean judge in a cooking show competition called "Bistro SMAP."

I'm now craving for clam chowder. Its just pure torture to watch eating shows before I eat... Look how Quentin is eating, he's like slurping everything away. I am slightly bothered by Brad Pitt's beard... I feel like there's going to be some food stuck there. Let's watch out if that actually happens.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LKk8_bTk0Q

Thanksgivings

I wish they still have parade floats like this

This is a time for you to either go into a food coma or get drunk as FUCK... Even better, DO BOTH! Why bother deciding between two equally good options? Just don't eat and drink too fast, because that may induce projectile vomiting (trust me, I know from personal experience). I would like to apologize again for what I did to your carpet two Thanksgivings ago... You know who you are.

ON a separate note:

If anyone comes to my abode and expects a turkey meal, this is what you will get:

ORIGAMI TURKEY.

And I'm not going to be that sober, so I might just give you a piece of crumpled paper.

HAVE A WONDERFUL THANKSGIVINGS!

Start Fucking with Gangster Rap Songs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLDitGAUrno

Courtesy of Katt Williams

Bumped into Natalie

Which Natalie?

THIS ONE:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8e6-IeQ0aw

At the 10:15 showing of "Men Who Stare at Goats" in Regal Union Square. Well, to be specific, my friend was the one that noticed her and I just ran into the theater to follow her. I swear to you that I was going to watch the same movie, I didn't just sat 2 rows behind her to stalk her.

She is gorgeous and quite tiny as a person. That's all.

Baby, I Just Wanna Do You

My favorite song of the week AND its better than "Tardy for the Party". I KNOW, how can that be possible right? Just listen, TRUST:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66TqUyjqM40

Don't any of you DARE to give me a dirty look when I'm singing this in public:

Baby baby, I just wanna do you, do you

Do you wanna do me, do me

Underneath the moonlight, the moonlight...Tonight

This is just a piece of true POETRY! UP YOURS Shakespeare!

I have really REALLY liked the show Modern Family; its one of those shows that's not only brilliant (like Arrested Development), but also could make me laugh out loud hard (no offense to 30 rock).

Trust. This show has potential. Watch it wherever it is available.

Flash Forward to AWESOMENESS

THIS SHOW IS AWESOME! AWESOOOOOOOOME I TELL YOU! GO WATCH IT NOW!

No? Not convincing enough? Well, the story line is basically that everyone, EVERYONE IN THE WORLD, blacked out for 2 minutes 17 seconds AT THE SAME TIME! On top of that, they also "see" a vision of their future for that duration of time! Flashback... FlashForward.... GET IT? GET IT???!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25kXHgWg938

Are you kidding me? That's not enough to hook you into it? Bitches, I'm trying! What else do you want more in a TV show huh?! There's already everything that you need in this show to keep you entertained for about an hour of your day! Romance (CHECK), Drama (CHECK), Possible-Marital-Affairs (CHECK), FBI (CHECK). Please don't be picky on me. PLEASE!

Now I'm just getting angry and its useless. WATCH IT NOW! I can't be bothered to convince you anymore now.

.................Why won't you watch it? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you... You don't have to watch it if you don't want to. You may watch it if you want to, I'm not going to force you.

I'm feeling bipolar today.

THERE IS A FIRE IN ST. MARKS!

THIS IS NOT TV RELATED AT ALL! BUT THERE IS A FIRE, AS IN A BURNING BUILDING, ON ST. MARKS! To be exact, its on St. Marks between 2nd and 3rd avenue. It happened about 40 minutes ago and the fire lasted about 30 minutes and the fire brigades came around 10-15 minutes after the smoke started (if I'm correct in my time estimation).

I don't know what caused the fire and if there's any injuries/casualties or anything, but all I have are photos and maybe some decent videos (which I'm not able to upload). First, I smelled something burning, so I looked outside my window and SAW THIS:

CLICK ON THE IMAGES TO ENLARGE IT

Went to my roof to see where it was located or how bad it was... and it looks pretty bad. The smoke was covering about 4 blocks and 2 avenues. It did NOT smell good at all. Hope nobody is injured.

If any of you know what's going on. Please tell me or post a link of the news to the comments section.

UPDATE: It seems that there's only 2 people that care enough about reporting this shit. I still can't find anything in the news that related to this morning's incident. After asking around, I think its safe to say that Klong (the Thai restaurant) was burned down by the fire. Fortunately, the building right above it seems fine.

UPDATEII: OK, thanks to my avid researcher, she found one article that perfectly described exactly what I have already written above. READ HERE . And yes, it has been confirmed that Klong was on fire.