Depression is Not Funny...?

So... as we are all unaware of, STARZ has been trying to jump into the"premium cable tv production" boat like the rest of its peers. I do have to tell Starz, that the key word here is PREMIUM, because so far everything just looked like something you can get out of Spike TV or the Oxygen channel.

The only reason I am watching "Gravity" is because of billboards brainwash every time I journey into Chelsea (another reason why I detest that area). Have you TRIED watching this "new original series?"

Uhh......

Its suppose to be a dark comedy/dramedy, but I think from the first episode it has failed to do either. The show's is centered on a support group for people that have failed to commit suicide. See, it does sound interesting right? RIGHT?

EEEEEEEK (sound of Taboo buzz)! WRONG BITCHES! Its confusing and as a lot of other reviewers have said, its because they can't seem to find a tone for the show.

Also, I personally think these people aren't depressed enough to display what actual depression is like. Its like these people never heard the term of "suicide watch," because miraculously after two days from physical recovery, they bounce back to their normal selves... I just hope to dear universe that Starz won't become the CW version of premium channels. Because by this point you should know how I feel about CWfreaking11.

I Love This Show!!!

OMG! LOL! IDK! Its like the best thing that ever happened to television, like when man created the air conditioner, but even better! Have you seen "High Society???" The show that follows some New York socialites, including Tinsley Mortimer (New York's most something socialite) and it basically documents their every move and decision about what they should do with their poor little rich lives. The star is definitely Tinsley herserlf (as she is the most famous one)... Should she still have to share her maid with her ex-husband? Should she hide her relationship from her mother? LIFE IS SOOOOO DIFFICULT! I'm literary stressed out for her. Champagne time!


I was actually surprised that anything in the CW could amount to anything even remotely entertaining. After watching an episode of this, the bigger surprise is finding her mom as the biggest famewhore of all. 
And if you believe me at this point, you are the biggest dumbass in the world. Happy April Fool's day!
Don't watch it. For your sake. Seriously. 

Have You Ever Wondered...

What a colonic is like?

THEN TUNE IN TO THE TYRA BANKS SHOW TOMORROW (FRIDAY)!!! Because, the crazy-ass that she is, will AIR THE FIRST EVER PUBLIC COLONIC ON TELEVISION! I'm not shitting you (pun intended)! I'm currently in Europe and won't be able to watch this mess, so I'm hoping that one of you poor souls will momentarily blind your eyes for about 30 minutes to report back to me about the whole shenanigan. Thank you!

I don't know what happened to my Tyra Banks correspondent... Actually I don't know what happened to all my correspondents that I hired... So, yes I apologize for them, and now I have to pick up all of their work. Please forgive me for the lack of updates, now I think I only have one reader left... aha... ha... ha.

I Got Back Into This?

I'm finally back. One thing I learned about television in central/eastern Europe is that THEY DON'T CENSOR words such as: FUCK/SHIT/BITCH/ASSHOLE/ETC. Yep, I was in Bratislava and they were airing "New York Goes to Work" and "I Love Money 2." And you know that shit is better without all the bleeps.

I know, I can't help it... Its just my own personal talent to find trash tv on wherever land I go to.

What can I tell you about Bratislava? That its a really small town (you can cover the whole town in 2 hours of walking) and that they have weird statues.

But to more important news here, I got back on perfect timing, as Fall TV Season just started. I'm still catching up on what I'm currently missing. But let me tell you what you SHOULD NOT WATCH: ANYTHING ON THE CW11. Seriously, I am bias against that channel and believe that they can't produce any decent shows. And DON'T YOU DARE put your hand on my face and be like screaming GOSSIP GIRL! In case you are a dumbass, GG SUCKS BALLS.

Now, they have this Vampire Diaries crap that just premiered. From what I understood by watching the trailer, its a combo of Twilight + cheap version of True Blood. And to no surprise, IT SUCKS SO BAD that a nuclear warhead should be directed towards the CW headquarters. THIS is the destruction of America, President Obama. No, its not going to be Osama bin Laden, the real terrorist are the ones working inside those stupid CW offices, churning out ideas like these and therefore destroying million of the lives of tweens.

From what I gathered, the vampire writes and narrates in a diary format......... such as: Dear Diary... Today I sucked more blood. END. ........... If this alone didn't convince you to not watch it... I don't know what else...I have nothing more to say...

*I still haven't seen the show as my eyes doesn't need to be put through this suffering, I only have interviewed people to recap me on what has been happening.

What's That? No Gossip Girl Tonight?

Oh No! Now what are the losers going to watch? 

Like I care. more like MWA-HA! But here's a picture of Chace Crawford (aka Nate Archibald) for you to enjoy, since I care so much to please my viewerships. For those of you that have been waiting 2 weeks for a new episode, its not gonna air tonight! Its going to air next week on March 16, while most of us is in Spring Break! HA-HA! 

XOXO, Judgmentally Yours

P.S.: Karma is a bitch, there's also no Ray J tonight. But the poll results show that half of you think that Feisty's boobs are real. 24 people voted. HURRAH. Muchos gracias. 

Tear-Fest

Yes, Its that time of the year again! The new season of America's Next Top Model! I just watched the new episode (cycle 12!) and there's been about 80,000 scenes involving girls crying over their dreams being CRUSHED by the TYRAnosaurus. Not only that, these girls would SCREAM every time Tyra, Ms. J, J. Alexander, or whoever would come into the scene. I know that they are bound to contract to get the perfect take on this screaming thing, but seriously, its getting old and its making me go deaf. 

The contestant includes: A girl who likes blood, A girl that has tons of scars, A girl that is epileptic, A plus size model who had a famous ex-boyfriend, A mega bitch, A naive bitch, A refugee, and the rest are just hicks from hicksville. 

This show is being shown on CW11, you know how I feel about this channel... its a TWEEN show and therefore its CRAP. And please, if you are serious about being a model, DO NOT EVER BE IN THIS SHOW! Its the kiss of freaking death. Plus, I will mock you for eternity for being retarded enough to think that it is even SLIGHTLY possible for you to even become a REAL model. Yes, that was a burn. 

I'm sorry you guys, but today I am dead. If this post isn't as mean enough as before, because I'm about to collapse any second now because of my horrendous midterm. I was delusional enough to think that I was going to do fine on it, as I didn't study 40% of the material (and watched FOTC instead). In the end, I had to resort to the infamous "when in doubt choose C" method for a chunk of the exam. DIE!

I'm not going to post any links for shows being shown on CW11 because I really don't want to, unless someone makes a request.