Jersey Shore is Sent From Heaven

How did I miss the premiere of "Jersey Shore" last Thursday? HOW?? This show is basically the best reality whatever there is on television right now! This show defies GRAVITY! That's how it blows the expectation out of my mind. Have you seen this show? ANYONE?? ITS AMAHZING.

Here's an in-depth analysis via Defamer as my mind is still in a high and I don't want writing to kill my buzz:

Jersey Shore is like opening a tiny present to find it is full of diamonds, but diamonds made of booze, puke, fights, diseases, and discarded thongs. You thought this gift couldn't get better, but it does. It really, really does.

The amazing thing about Jersey Shore is that it is comprised of only one very distinctive type—the guido—and it is a type in which all of the participants not only willingly identify, but glorify. They are not afraid of being seen as a stereotype because they want to be the big-haired, muscled out, tanned freak in a too-tight Armani Exchange top. While the rest of society may deride the guido, these specimens see nothing wrong with it, because they live in a universe where it is the norm. Based on the other inmates in the Sleazeside Heights zoo, there is nothing manufactured about these people. They do not possess the fame-seeking guile of the Speidis of the world, because their only aspiration is to be revered as the ultimate guido. Because of this, no coaxing into conformity with reality show norms is needed. All the cameras have to do is sit back and observe.

Who's my favorite character? ALL OF THEM! Each of them are a rough diamond covered in fake tan. Please let there be like 5 seasons of this TV God, if you let us endure with The Hills for so long, this is one of the ways you can reward us for the torture you have put through us. Amen.