No, I'm just kidding. I usually won't write posts about movies, since it is not my area of expertise, but my friend Steve has requested (and you know I can't say no to one) that I wrote a review for the movie "Watchmen." Yes, THAT movie that a whole bunch of people are going nuts over because apparently its based on THE "awesomest" graphic novel ever.
After finishing the movie, Steve proclaimed that "this is THE best FUCKING movie EVER!" Because of that Steve also has somewhat threatened me that I "have to write a GOOD review, or [he's] going to kill me."
Okay Steve, I will write pretty things about it since you put your terms so nicely for me.
[He also knows where I live].
First thing to write about it that this is a PENIS movie. I'm not kidding you guys, that glowing blue man (Dr. Manhattan played by Billy Crudup) that you see in the trailer is NAKED for 80% of the movie. When I first noticed it (the first thing I noticed actually) I was like.... Did they just showed an actual (glowing blue) penis??? Then they did it again and AGAIN. It was like playing spot-the-penis; its a DONG-fest my viewerships. Its really just hanging there for everyone to see. How big is it you asked? Not bad, go see the movie so you can judge for yourself. So far so good right Steve?
sexyEW19 asked me if I might have mistakenly watched a porno because he was startled that I mentioned about the penis. No, this movie is not porn, just needed to clarify that.
If you haven't read the graphic novel, then all I can tell you that it is NOT your regular superhero movie. NOT AT ALL. Its 2 hours and 43 minutes of intense drama (politics, justice, humanity, violence, love, etc) and was surprisingly easy enough to understand, but at the same time dense enough to give you a headache. However, I thought that it was just OKAY (not amazing) movie. Besides all the penis scenes, this was definitely a "guy's movie," as there was also lots of action going on (both sex and violence). Also, the movie was aesthetically cool, and if I was high I would have probably liked it a lot more.
My final review is that you SHOULD go watch the movie to check it out (as it is cool), but I will most likely NOT watch it for the second time.
Are you happy Steve? If not, write something in my comment box. You are WELCOME!
dear judgmental readers, do not be too quick to take in whatever deb said. You have to watch it to judge it for yourself. Few movies these days are so dense in its plot. Its a mash up of everything suspense, love, gore, fantasy, appending armageddon, and comic book heroes, which makes this movie totally awesome!!
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such a short review....being a loyal reader, we are deeply disappointed by the lack of mention of the Freudian symbolism, the nod to sexual equality by showing both boobies and willies (yay for le homage to porn), the elegance of breaking bones and exploding flesh, a Grand Guignol showing of the finest level! An epic movie of the coolest proportion, we dare say! And Nite Owl was the epitome of geek cool lol
ReplyDeleteIt seems that you have a lot more to write about the movie, anonymous. But all those aspects really flew over my head and I am not such a big fan of gore and was covering my eyes when blood was involved. I'm sorry if I did not mention boobies, there was only 2 scenes with boobies and that is already somewhat normal to see when you watch R-rated movies these days. HOWEVER, a glowing penis is a totally different thing to see.
ReplyDeletei'm trying to figure out who you are... since it doesn't seem like you're my regular anonymous commenter. WHO ARE YOU?
We are the hole in things, o judgmental one, the piece that never fits, there since the beginning. We have been silent before, but we will be silent no more.... maybe. Lots of interesting stuff thee writes, after all.
ReplyDeletehmm the prose seems familiar... dennis? -sp
ReplyDeleteAH-HAH! KETAUAN DEH LOE! thanks sp
ReplyDeleteInteresting point that you brought up there Anon. Dr. Manhattan was trained as a child to be a watch repairman. That's all that I could say without spoiling the movie. Just go watch it. I'm pretty sure you're gonna like it. That is if you are my regular anonymous commenter.
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